BONUS F: Free yourself to find yourself

Freedom only comes
when you jump
into your life.

I have spent the past 6 months of my life on what I can call none other than a never ending emotional rollercoaster ride though hell. There have been high moments of elation and fun followed by low times of deep sadness and frustration - I hate to admit more of the latter than the former.

While I have spent countless hours seeking the advice and comfort of friends, family members, co workers, doctors, and even potential love interests, none of these outlets have given me the answers or explanations that I seek. However, this is not to discount the great advice and support I have received. Many of these people have been of great moral and emotional support and I owe each person an incredible amount of gratitude for their efforts in helping me cope with my life's stresses.

The latest and greatest place to which my journey toward self discovery has led me is an fairly unfamiliar one - far more so than I'd like to disclose.  This undiscovered sanctuary of potential answers is…(dramatic pause)… church.

I have not been to church of any kind of regular basis in over a decade; and to be quite honest, I’m not entirely certain of what finally subconsciously motivated me to make the trip 60 some blocks uptown to the Church of St Paul the Apostle this past weekend. Whatever the unknown force may have been, I am extremely glad that it propelled me to the cathedral doors on Columbus Avenue.

The Church of St Paul the Apostle, built in 1885

The major premise of this Easter season service was that in order to find ourselves, we must free ourselves from the facets of our lives over which we have no control.

Free yourself to imagine that you are not in control of the things around you – other people’s opinions, the economy, broken relationships…

What a foreign concept – the idea that we as individuals are not necessarily responsible for every aspect of our lives. It is an idea that can certainly lift the proverbial weight from our shoulders to realize that there are certain things we simply cannot control. Perhaps many of us already know there are things in this universe outside of our control, but the ultimate challenge is to truly understand and accept this fact. Once we have come to accept this realization, I surmise and hope that it is slightly easier to breathe and carry on.

This concept of letting go  (after all, it is lent) seems it may give me many heart palpitations in the process of achieving the aforementioned freedom because, to be rather frank, I have a Type A personality – I prefer to do things specifically my way in my time. I like to take control and be responsible; letting someone else drive is simply not in my nature. The pastor said these words verbatim during the service – “live without anxiety.”

Please, sign me up for that life!  No anxiety? Don’t mind if I do.

In all seriousness though, being anxiety free is a conscious choice that we each have to make; and it will certainly be a challenge for me. But the first step in the process of recovery is recognizing that you have a problem, right? So each day going forward, I must repeat to myself “Don’t stress; some things are out of your control.”

You have to leave things behind to go on your own journey to find yourself.

The first thing that I plan to leave behind is the notion that there are answers...there are no answers; there is just a life which we cannot control - and all we can do is hope that the landing is soft when we jump. 

FOOD: How about some hash?

Sweet Potato, Bacon, and Apple Hash

A friend recommended this recipe to me and I have been slightly obsessed ever since. As you can tell from my previous posts, I love comfort food – nothing makes me happier than a belly full of it. This is definitely one of those comforting dishes. It is so incredibly flavorful but the recipe is so simple and quick. I’m going to make it as many times as possible until the warm weather is here to stay!

The original recipe came from the famous and spunky Anne Burrell, but I have made a few modifications to suit my tastes and diet. First, I substituted regular bacon for turkey bacon in order to make the recipe lower in fat. Next, I omitted the scallion and used an extra large onion because I love onion. Lastly, I also omitted pepitas because I just didn’t think the recipe needed them.

See the original recipe here.

INGREDIENTS

     . 2 garnet yams, peeled and cut into 1/2-inch dice

     . Extra-virgin olive oil

     . salt

     . 4 to 6 slices thick cut bacon, cut into small pieces

     . 1 large onion, diced

     . 2 Granny Smith apples, peeled, cored, and diced

DIRECTIONS

Preheat the oven to 400 degrees F.

Toss the diced sweet potatoes in the olive oil and sprinkle with salt. Make sure the potatoes are coated evenly and arrange them on a baking sheet. Roast the sweet potatoes until they are tender, approximately 10 to 15 minutes. Remove the potatoes from the oven and set aside.

Coat a large saute pan with olive oil. Cook the bacon over medium head and when the bacon has started to brown, add the onions, season with salt and saute until the onions are very soft. Add the apples and saute for 3 to 4 minutes. Stir in the sweet potatoes, and saute until the sweet potatoes are cooked through and starting to become crispy, about 7 to 8 minutes.

After I finished cooking everything, I mashed it all together slightly…just enough to break down some of the potato cubes, because I prefer this consistency better. You don’t have to do this though, whatever you prefer is fine.

Transfer to a dish, serve, and try not to inhale the whole dish enjoy!

YUM, this dish is so good it almost makes me want the cold weather to last a little bit longer…

ALMOST. 

FITNESS: Is it in your genes?

Great article courtesy of the New York Times - check it out.

http://well.blogs.nytimes.com/2011/03/16/is-fitness-all-in-the-genes/

FITNESS: Step it up!

Everyone knows that cardio is a very important part of any work out routine, no record breaking revelation there. The problem is, basic cardio machines can get very boring and monotonous rather quickly. If you, like me, live in an urban area that doesn’t allow you to exercise outdoors very often, you are probably forced to utilize the cardio machines that your gym has to offer...either that, or you sit at home on your couch all night – let’s hope it’s the former and not the latter!

Ok, maybe I exaggerated a bit when I said you can’t exercise outdoors in urban areas…Yes, here in NYC, we do have amazing parks in which to run…but have you ever even walked through Central Park?! You are one in a gigantic herd of runners / walkers / skaters / bikers / stroller moms / smelly horse and carriages / tourists with cameras strapped around their necks who stop at every future cab road kill damn pigeon that crosses their path…the list goes on…Not too fun when you deal with crowds upon crowds of annoying tourists!!! people everyday of your life. 

Anyway, the point is – in order to maintain a regular cardiovascular work out – we are often forced to use the cardio equipment available at our gym. But it doesn’t have to be a dull and droning 30-60 minute cardio session on the treadmill or elliptical machine – there are more fun options out there. I have always been a big fan of using the Stairmaster at the gym; the step mill version that resembles a mini-escalator, not the kind with two petals that barely move. These great machines live in the shadows of the dull and boring treadmill but need to recognized for their benefits.

My favorite Stairmasters at my local New York Sports Club

 Not only does a workout on the Stairmaster get your heart pumping vigorously but it is also a tremendous workout for your glutes, hamstrings, quads, and calves. The incline of the stairs really engages these lower body muscles much better than standard flat surface activity….and trust me, it’s tiring! And it gives you a great ass…who doesn’t want that?

As with most cardio routines, the most efficient way to burn fat is by performing intervals – a period of intense exertion followed by a period of reduced exertion (followed by a period of intense exertion…then reduced exertion….you get the point - REPEAT!)

But feel free to start slow and work your way up to a more difficult level…don’t start out too quickly or you might lose your balance and tumble off the machine… no one wants to be that girl!

Another great way to get in a good and sometimes subconscious stair work out is to (...wait for it...) USE REAL STAIRS! Some of us lucky city dwellers live in walk-up buildings where we actually HAVE to walk up and down the stairs every time we enter or leave our apartments. (Side note: I had friends visit from out of town recently who, after lugging their luggage up the two flights to my apartment, gasped “Where’s the elevator?!” I just giggled and said, “Welcome to New York!”) So the long and short of it is – use the real stairs whenever you can.

I recently took a trip out to California and had the unfortunate opportunity privilege of encountering the Santa Monica stairs… those are some serious stairs! Even though I was scared of accidentally slipping and somersaulting all the way down the 200+ stair flight, it was an incredible work out… I was sore for nearly a week afterwards…my butt is thanking me now though! 

Going up the Santa Monica stairs

You don't want to fall down these stairs...

So if you want your ass and thighs to be thanking you by the time daisy dukes season rolls around (ahem it’s sooner than you think!), get to steppin’!

FASHION: Finder's Keepers

I purchased this great Python ring on a recent trip to Nordstrom. It sat amongst an assortment of similar over the top costume jewelry. Naturally, I wanted nearly every grandiose ring in the display case. However, much to my dismay, most of the pieces cost over $225...no thank you! After much digging around, I stumbled upon this ring (with some help) and gasp it was just under $40! Buying it was a no-brainer. I love how obnoxiously huge it is! With a piece of jewelry that makes a statement such as this, the rest of your look for the day can be simple and monochromatic - that's how I wore it (with all black). Definitely a new favorite!

ps ditched my Essie "Little Brown Dress" nail color for OPI's "You Don't Know Jacques" - glad I jumped on this bandwagon because it's just as great as everyone said!

FOOD: Ma...the MEATLOAF!

Who doesn't love Mom's meatloaf!? There's nothing like traditional comfort food to warm you up in the last few weeks of the frigid winter. But no matter how good Mom's meatloaf tastes, it is most likely heavy and fatty...not too comforting.  

This recipe, courtesy of the wonderful Giada De Laurentiis, is a lighter yet much more flavorful version of mom's meatloaf (SORRY MOM!) Firstly, it's made with ground turkey, which is considerably lower in fat than traditional beef/pork blends. Next, sun-dried tomatoes and salty feta cheese add a powerful and savory punch of flavor. 

There are a few alterations I've made to the original recipe, which are *starred* below. Also, I doubled this recipe and made a free form loaf on a baking pan (yes, I really like this meatloaf!) - it's up to you if you'd like to use a loaf pan or make a free form loaf. 

I make this turkey meatloaf all the time and really recommend it - it's very easy and makes great leftovers.

SUNDRIED TOMATO and FETA TURKEY MEATLOAF

Ingredients

• Vegetable cooking spray
• 1/2 cup plain bread crumbs
• 1/3 cup chopped fresh flat-leaf parsley
• 1/4 cup chopped garlic and herb-marinated sun-dried tomatoes
• 2 cloves garlic, minced, optional
• 2 eggs, at room temperature, lightly beaten
• 2 tablespoons whole milk* 
• 1/2 cup crumbled feta cheese**
• 1 1/2 teaspoons salt
• 1 teaspoon freshly ground black pepper
• 1 pound ground turkey
• one small onion, chopped***

* I used skim milk

** I used light feta (via Trader Joe's)

*** I added the onion...simply because...I love onion!

Directions

Preheat the oven to 375 degrees F.

Coat a 9 by 5-inch loaf pan with cooking spray.

Combine the bread crumbs, parsley, sun-dried tomatoes, garlic, if using, eggs, milk, feta, onion, salt, and pepper. Add the turkey and gently stir to combine - do not overwork the meat.

Carefully pack the meat mixture into the prepared pan and bake until the internal temperature registers 165 degrees F on an instant-read thermometer, about 45 minutes. Remove from the oven and let rest for 5 minutes. Transfer to a cutting board and slice. Put on a serving platter and serve.

(Just like I do with my banana bread, I slice the meatloaf into individual portions and freeze them so that I have a quick grab and go lunch!)

Fashion: POP

I love pairing lots of neutrals (and quite often all black) with an unexpected pop of color. With this outfit, I used the bright purple belt to break up the seriousness of my brown and black ensemble. I also like the idea of layering different textures of fabrics to have the same effect. For instance, the top is silk; the bandage skirt is a textured stretchy knit; and both the belt and over the knee boots are suede. Then I layer on a couple bangles on each wrist to add some more texture and of course a little edge. 

Silk wrap top / knit bandage skirt: Forever 21

Purple & Gold Belt: French Connection

Over the Knee Boots: Aldo

CC Logo Bangle: Coach, Black & Gold Bracelet: Urban Outfitters (Dublin, Ireland), Leaf Bangle / Tiger Bangle: Forever 21, Leather Wrap Bracelet: J Crew, Stone & Rhinestone Ring: Juicy Couture, Dome Ring: My grandmother's, Pinky ring: from childhood